I'm probably confused. I go back and forth regarding decisions of my LJ. Friends-only one day. No personal connections another. Friends-only sometimes. All public.

I should probably just find a different outlet instead of putting all my thoughts and feelings visibly on the internet for all to see, but I've been doing it for a long time- 7 years on this particular journal- and I had been doing it since I was 12. I miss not caring about it. That was nice. I think I'm just paranoid. I feel like everyone is against me- even the people who probably aren't.

I desperately want to set up a REAL blog. That talks about STUFF- and only me to a degree... but it seems difficult, to say the least. I don't know what to write about anymore.

I'm pretty confident that I have an "emotional disorder," but I don't want to see anyone about it because I don't want to take drugs... and as fun as it is to IMAGINE that I will be in a mental institution one day, the reality of it is that I do not want to do it. At all... and those close to me (that one whole person) know that it's entirely possible that I would be.

So I'll continue the ups and downs of extreme values until it's the end of me, I suppose.

To hell with it! You shall now again get all of me... only slightly edited, potentially... but since I've been depressed/paranoid/anxious a lot lately, I'll try to save you all from reading that crap.
asile_de_fou: (Default)
( Aug. 13th, 2010 05:19 am)
A week or so ago, I signed up for a website called Shelfari. It's one of those online bookshelves/book review websites. So far I like it...

At least, I liked it until today.

Someone asked for my recommendation of Alice's Adventures in Wonderland- and if it is like the movie.

WHAT?

Since they didn't specify, I assumed they were asking about Tim Burton's film that I still haven't seen. I told them how in the book, Alice is a little girl, not a young woman- so no, it is probably NOT like the movie... And then I recommended them to read it because "everyone needs a dose of proper classic literature, regardless if they like the story or not." Hopefully convincing them to read classic literature will make their brain a little... better.

Now that it is 5:30 AM, I must sleep before my nephew wakes up and throws another tantrum because my door is locked.
asile_de_fou: (condomsforever)
( Aug. 13th, 2010 11:43 am)
I'm not a kid person. I've never been a kid person. I will never be a kid person. I do not want kids.

It really sucks that I'm an aunt. I have two nephews- my sister's step-son, who is 14 or something and her son, who I think is three.

Three-year-old nephew stayed over last night because my father is watching him while my sister does something today. He's stolen my money (and refused to give it back when I caught him) and he also steals my Wii games. One of which, I had gotten recently, and he took it out of the case and was swinging it around. It is now cracked and it was covered in sticky, gross fingerprints. I cleaned it, the crack doesn't really affect it, but if he gets hold of the game again, it will likely get worse.

Let's not forget how everyone used to let him take the Wiimotes and swing them around like a maniac because it was "cute." What happened? One of the Wiimotes doesn't work how it is supposed to. Probably because of excessive hitting onto tables and brick. Its balance is off. You have to hold it at an angle for it to register as being held straight.

I'm really tired of bratty behavior being acceptable because it's "cute." If I say I don't want you to touch my stuff, you should stop touching my stuff. Sure, it's the same with any child and that's just how they "are," but I think they're just getting away with too much.

My dog is even tired of him.

And my sister thought I would be open to babysitting him for a few days this week. There isn't enough money in the world to make me want to babysit.

Condoms Forever.
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